Yesterday I realized that, while writing my first blog about trying to become a better mommy, I told my children multiple times to not bother me because I was busy. Wow, major fail. But it made me realize something about myself. I am very one track minded and have a hard time letting anything disrupt me. Unfortunately, that includes my children wanting attention. I too often let my wants and desires come before theirs. That needs to stop. So I have come to the first step of becoming a super-mommy. Part one: stop being so concerned about entertaining myself. Life isn't about me. This means I will limit the time I spend browsing Facebook or reading blogs to when my kids are occupied and do not desire my participation (like when Chris and Aurora are playing together or Abby is napping. Hannah is still in the NICU). Part two: play with my kids more. Let me stop here and say that I know many moms will read this and not understand how a mother would even need to list this as a step. I know it should be obvious, playing with your kids, but frankly it doesn't come naturally to me. I remember being a kid and not understanding why my mother didn't know how to play Barbies. I mean, how hard could it be? Why did she prefer to just dress them in their nice clothes, brush their hair, and set them up on a shelf? Now I totally get it. I can watch my kids play, talk to them about their game, but I am at a loss as to how I should play with them. I try, don't get me wrong, I'm just no good at it. Aurora loves playing My Little Ponies and wants me to play with her. I end up just sitting there, holding one of the reject ponies, while she has them interact with each other. Occasionally I will have my pony move around until she informs me that I'm "doing it wrong". ::Sigh:: I'm no better with Chris. He loves video games (and is really good at them). I'm not a fan of video games but caved and got him Mario Kart for the Wii. I thought to myself, "He is only 5 and can come in first place. I should be able to give him a run for his money". Um...not quite. Our first race together I came in dead last. Dead last doesn't even begin to explain how "last" I was. I was almost a full lap behind the character that came in 11th place. We even own the wheel controller so people of all ages can play. Honestly it was embarrassing. He just asks me to watch him play now.
Why does playing with my kids come so hard to me? Not only is it frustrating, it's harmful to my kids' perception of me. I truly want to play with them, want them to know I value them and treasure our time together. They are only little for a short period of time. They grow up far too fast to let these days go by with me being more concerned about cleaning or surfing the internet than making memories with my children. The dishes will still be there after they go to bed. My house wont collapse if I skip laundry for a day or two. Luke 12:34 says "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." I need to seriously think about what I have made my treasure. A woman must first love God, then her husband, then her children. Her duties and responsibilities might include housekeeping and maintaining the home, but that is not where her heart lies. Children are a treasure from the Lord, a reward that should be valued and cared for. I need to remind myself of this throughout the day. Starting tomorrow (since they are already in bed tonight) I will make a point of putting down the iPad, putting down my phone, getting down on the floor with them and playing whatever they choose. I will make memories with them and make sure they know they are loved and valued. That's my first step to becoming a super-mommy.
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